MacMama

Sick Dude and Parenting Reflections

2011-06-19T06:51:00.000-07:00

Thatch had a cold about a week ago, and though he seemed fine during the day it made him fairly miserable at night. For 3 nights he would only sleep on me, in the recliner.

During the third (exhausting) night, right when I was wishing for my bed and a less-clingy child, he started to cry, reached out and touched my face, and then sighed happily and drifted back off to sleep.

And suddenly I felt not exhausted, but proud. (okay, exhausted AND proud) Proud that I had bonded so well with this beautiful boy, that when he didn't feel well he needed *me*. It just seemed so RIGHT. So natural.

Which made me reflect yet again on the huge mistakes I made with Lay-- too many parenting books, not enough trusting my own instinct. The book I held in such high esteem, which I followed faithfully-- and yes, it DID make her sleep early, and yes it DID make her "self-soothe", but only because she learned that I wouldn't come when she cried, and only because she no longer trusted me to soothe her. I have no memories of holding her as a baby when she slept, because I never did. She was easier (as if THAT is what we should be striving for)-- she never needed me to rock her when she was sick, never ran to me when she got hurt or tired--she wanted her blankie and her bed instead. Easier, because I chose to follow all of the common Christian advice, and put my infant on a strict schedule, make her sleep alone, and comfort herself.

I still loved and enjoyed my daughter, but we were missing something important. When I realized my mistake, I had to re-bond with her as a toddler. It took a lot of years to build the bond with her that I would have had naturally had I not followed that horrible book. (The still very popular Babywise, which has several medical warnings against it). I remember the first time she was sick and wanted me to sleep with her-- she was 4. I don't think I'll ever completely get past the guilt of how I screwed up with her, though I know it was because I was an overwhelmed new parent, and those (effing) books seemed to have all of the answers. I learned a valuable lesson though, to never ignore my own instincts. I'm a better parent because of it, and I have many memories of holding a sleeping Paisley, and countless ones of snuggling a dreaming Thatcher.

It's tiring sometimes, but it really is so, so worth it.

Summer Daze

2011-06-05T13:19:00.001-07:00

Well it's officially summer. How do I know this, you ask?
My children have returned to their nudist roots. Piles of clothes and discarded diapers fill every chair on the patio. Unexpected guests are greeted with a warm and gentle, "Hold on a second! Paisley! Get some undies on! Now!"

In the not-quite-miserable heat, the girls have been bug-catching, blue-pool lounging, and letting their imaginations run wild with dozens of little animals (about which I gladly sacrificed my hippie ideals for some plastic, made-in-China, hours-long entertainment i.e. mommy-time.)

The boy continues to be the World's Cutest Kid, smoothing over any parental irritation with a dimpled smile. He's absolutely obsessed with colors and letters-- at 20 months he knows every color, almost every letter and a few letter sounds. His awe-inspiring fits are getting shorter and more manageable, and after 2 whopping months of sleeping through the night, I'm getting serious baby-fever again. Ruh-roh.

Pais is growing up quickly-- it seems like kids have these sudden spurts where they do a year of maturing in 2 or 3 months... she's in one of those. She still has a 2-second attention span (at least for things *I* ask her to do), but now she's asking great philosophical questions and peppering her speech with words like "espeshewy," "sewiouswy," and "intewesting." Her imagination is amazing, and right now she's spending hours outside every day acting out plastic-animal dramas, comedies, and American-Idol spin-offs.

Layla... well, she's always been old. I swear we're going through pre-teen drama right now (at nearly 6). She's rolling her eyes and asking "seriously?" when Daddy tries to be funny. (which makes us want to do it even more). She's reading chapter books, and loving being a big sister. She's leading the campaign for baby #4, and she's convinced her sister to want one as well (though Pais was at first completely against the idea. "I don't want anotho baby, because like, they take SO long to gwow up and PLAY with us!")

I'm finally FINALLY being artsy again. It feels so good to be doing something for me-- something besides all of the day-to-day mama stuff. I love the mama stuff... but it gets monotonous, and like lots of other mommies out there I felt like I had lost part of myself somewhere between the 1,232nd diaper change and 425th load of laundry. Making things and reading helps me remember that other part of myself... now I just need to get better at making and maintaining friendships. I feel like such an idiot sometimes, starved for adult conversation, with other mommies right across the street... and I don't do anything about it! Mom-dating is even worse than regular dating I think (though the latter is pretty foggy). I just need to get my butt out there, and make a priority of hanging out with other moms.

Oh yeah, and I also need to cut down on my carbs. And exercise. And keep up with the laundry, homeschooling, and my jewelry business. And make sure the kids are active enough, social enough, and eating healthy enough. And that Jacob and I get enough alone time. And that I get enough *me* time. So many things I feel like I'm not doing as well as I should be, and yet I want another baby. I must be crazy. And yet... watching my three snuggle together on the couch, I get a little teary. And I realize that for me, the very best moments of parenthood-- those Hallmark, cue the music, life-doesn't-get-any-better-than-this moments, have all been watching them together. Paisley stealing a kiss from baby brother on her way out the door, The sisters cuddled up together asleep in their bed, the way Thatcher looks at Layla with such complete adoration (and sometimes accidentally calls her mama)... so yeah, maybe I'm crazy, but I'd like one more. Even if we don't have another though, and even though it's hectic and loud, messy and emotional, I really do feel like the luckiest mama and wife in the world.

the incredible annual blogger strikes again!

2011-05-10T08:27:00.000-07:00

All right, this is embarrassing. It's been over a year since I last blogged. My excuse is that I've been using Facebook like a blog. And that I have 3 small kids. And my little guy is super high-maintenance. And I've been lazy.

Okay, let's see... Thatcher went from getting up once a night to getting up 2-3 times. Then to staying up for hours in the middle of the night. Then to getting up at 2:30. FOR THE DAY. By this time he was 16 months old. We took him off dairy, no change. We tried going gluten-free, no change. I tried keeping a food diary for him and charting which nights were the worst, which led me to take him off of eggs, strawberries, citrus, and hummus. No change. We tried probiotics... you get the idea.

Needless to say, I was at the end of my rope, when suddenly the problem was solved in a totally unexpected way. Thatch got the stomach flu. Bad. Like, throwing up for 18 hours straight bad. Then for the 24 hours after that he could only suck on ice cubes-- any amount of water and he would start throwing up again. I had weaned him from the bottle at least 3 times since he was a year old, but when it made no difference in his sleeping I ended up going back to it so I had SOME way to get him back to sleep. Getting so sick, he was completely off of the bottle again for 4 days, and I decided we may as well take it away officially. 3 nights after he got better, he slept through the night. Then again. And again. Now at 19 months he is sleeping 10-11 hours straight at night. Usually. :)

Some more stats from my year of MIA:

First word: vrrrrrroom! Yes, a car sound preempted "mama" by a couple of days.
Walked: 11 months
STTN: 18 months *angels rejoicing*

T is now 19 months. He is in what I like to call the "label-maker" phase. He points and names EVERYTHING he sees. He was/is a very late talker, but he understood everything I told him from a young age. Lately he has been obsessed with letters, and already knows a few. He also knows his colors; blue, yellow, red, purple, and green... even though he can barely talk. (boo, yo-yo, weh, po-po, ghee)

He's also throwing some incredible, mind-blowing, award-winning fits lately. If he was being eaten alive by lions, his volume & intensity of screaming would STILL be a tad dramatic.

The current loves of his little life are mama, dada, lala, seesee, cars (cah!), balls (bah!), his blankie (baby), and his stuffed elephant Bob (Bah!).

Every time he wakes up or feels like a cuddle he walks up to me, hands me his blankie, announces "baby!" (which I must throw over my shoulder), then hands me Bob (Bah!) which goes on top of blankie, then he stretches his arms up and says "Dat-doh!" (Thatcher) which means I should pick him up so he can cuddle me, blankie, and Bob at the same time. It's the cutest thing ever, but don't be fooled-- following his directions is not optional. Any failure on the part of the mother (or other chosen adult) will result in an immediate meltdown.

Oh yes, and since the last time I blogged the boy has grown hair. And it's curly. Curly hair, dimples, and huge blue eyes. This is why he runs things around here. We're all putty in his sticky little hands.

Thatch-- 9 1/2 months old!

2010-07-15T15:54:00.001-07:00

My little baby boy is speeding along quickly to his 1st birthday. He's a sweet and easy-going guy, a lot like his sisters were. We're still eagerly awaiting the whole sleep-through-the-night thing, but I'm finally breaking some bad habits (aka bringing a bottle to bed) and it seems to be helping. The last 3 nights he only got up once-- which is a vast improvement over the 3 times he usually gets up. Who knew I'd be so psyched for my 9-month old to do a 6-hour stretch?!?

Here are some more stats:
Furniture surfing-- 8 3/4 months
Standing alone for several seconds-- 9 months. At 9 1/2 months he can stand for quite a while. We're thinking he'll be on the early side for walking.
STTN-- *taps foot*
Teeth-- 3rd one at 8 months, then another every 2 weeks since. (fun!) He's just cutting his 7th at almost 10 months.

He LOVES music, and dances non-stop to anything resembling a beat-- be that actual music, a coffee grinder, a drill...
He's also developed a very creative crawling solution. On slick floors like we have, he maintains the baby-seal-drag. On carpet or rugs he does the "normal" crawl. On gravel, grass, or anything else uncomfortable he puts his butt way up and crawls on his hands, left foot, and right knee.
He shakes his head "no" a lot, but it's usually dance-related. He eats everything we do, and ADORES being rough-housed. He's an adrenaline junkie already-- if you surprise him by "dropping" or "throwing" him when he's not expecting it, it gets a huge smile and laugh every time. Luckily I've already been broken-in by his trouble-maker big sister, so we're ready for his toddlerhood. We think.

Laylie: Almost 5!

2010-05-08T14:25:00.000-07:00

This picture Tara took is a little scary. My oldest daughter is really growing up. As much as I look forward to watching and helping her become the amazing woman I know she'll be... it still makes me get a little teary. I'm not ready to lose my little girl quite yet. (even though in many ways she's always been about 30) :)

Ms. P

2010-05-08T13:59:00.001-07:00

I know I've let way too many things go without being documented... and these kids are growing up and changing so fast it's ridiculous, so a few more things before I forget.

Paisley.
She's coined a unique term of endearment..."ah-nah-no, ah-nah-no." No Idea where she got it, but for the last several months it's been, "Yowe the best mama in the whole wide wode ah-nah-no ah-nah-no!" Or "Yowe my mommy Mommy! Ah-nah-no ah-nah-no."

She's also waaaaaay into the princess thing right now. There's a certain rainbow-striped dress that is "the pwincess dwess" and she's HAD to wear it daily for several weeks now. Usually I can get her to take it off at some point of the day so it can be washed, and occasionally I can get her to wear something else for a little while, but we haven't gone 24 hours without wearing it for about a month. Here's proof...

Some of her quotes that I facebooked:

Paisley holds up a chicken nugget. "It's chicken! It's a DEAD chicken! So we can eat it! Yum!"

Me: "What did you get into?" Paisley: "Nuffing." Me: "Open your mouth...*take picture*...is that chocolate?" Paisley: "Nope." (please note what she's STILL wearing)

Paisley watched Toni Braxton perform on tv, looked down at herself, and announced, "Mommy... I have kid boobs." I laughed, "You have kid boobs?" "Yeah," she said, "see?" *lifts shirt up to show me* Uh-oh.

I SO wish someone else was hearing this conversation with me. Layla: "I'm making a boy robot named Beesbopped." Paisley: "Does he have a penis?" Layla: "No." Paisley: "Wait, he's a boy robot but he doesn't have a penis?" Layla: "I know, weird, huh?" And on, and on, and on...

L&P got sent inside tonight when they disobeyed Daddy for the 2nd time. Layla yelled, "Staying in the house is TERRIBLE!" Paisley followed up with, "Yeah, you guys are JUST JEALOUS!" to which Layla replied, "Yeah! You tell'em Paisley!" When Jacob and I stopped giggling outside we had to go in and have a little talk about still being respectful even when you feel upset. I would have killed for a video of that moment.

P was so happy that "church came to our house!" last night. I love that she thinks of "church" as people, not a place.

Paisley: (talking about Jacob and I) "Layla! They're going to kiss! Watch!" Layla: "Eh, I'm not really into it."

A little more baby-booking...

2010-04-17T16:37:00.000-07:00

Thatcher:
Sat unassisted: 6 1/2 months
Crawl/scooted: Backwards-6 months Forward--soon he hopes!
Started babbling: 5 1/2 months
STTN: STILL TBA... he's only up once now though, so we're improving.
Cut first tooth: 6 months, second at 6 1/2
Started solids: 6 months. So far he likes pears, pizza crust (bad mommy) and bananas, isn't a fan of peas or yogurt, and is desperately in love with sweet potatoes.

8 months: moving all around the house baby-sea-lion-style. (works well on shiny floors) T also does "So Big" and claps when we say "yay!" Pulls up to his knees, and even to a stand occasionally. Sleeping is WORSE now... he better be cutting at least 6 teeth to justify getting up 5X a night, or he's grounded. He eats anything and everything, and feeds himself finger foods really well (although no pincer grasp yet)

Most of all he loves loves LOVES water. The bath, the pool, the sprinklers... he is so splash-happy that no other kid wants to play near him. He also tries to push away from me to "swim" by himself (he's also discovered outlets and cords)... I might have another Trouble on my hands soon. Good thing middle sis prepared me this time.

Chickens.

2010-03-29T15:16:00.000-07:00

Well, we're chicken farmers now.
The more I learn about the things we eat, the less I want to eat at all... which led us to the idea of raising our own (happy, healthy, free-range, pesticide-free) chickens for eggs. I went online to soak up every possible bit of knowledge about backyard chickens. I tend to get a little, uh, temporarily obsessed with new ideas (which makes the internet a perfect drug) so after a few days worth of research I was ready to get down to chicken business.
The three chicken breeds I chose were Buff Orpingtons, Barred Rocks, and Black Australorps. (chosen because they are all quiet, gentle, and good egg-layers) We used the girls' abandoned playhouse for the coop and decided the chickens could have the too-shady-for-vegetables side of the house. I made a nest box out of a rubbermaid container with a door cut in the side of it, Jacob put 2 roosting poles in the house, and we were ready. We got 3 Buffs from our friend and midwife Wendy, and 2 Barred Rocks from a farmer in Mesa.

Cut to 9 days later....

It's been over a week, and I have to say I LOVE having chickens. I wish we would have done this a long time ago. They are a lot calmer and quieter than I thought they'd be, and the girls love feeding them weeds and vegetable scraps. The 5 ladies have plenty of space (about 15' X 30') so there isn't any smell at all. They spend the day either scratching and eating, or laying in the shade. They do "beg" to be let out into our yard sometimes. We have tons of spiders and other crawlies around our fence line, and they like to do perimeter sweeps. I thought they'd just let themselves out-- it's only a 3' fence-- but they're too fat and lazy to jump, so they stand at the gate and purr until we give in.

The only thing that's been a problem so far is the "egg cackle." Luckily it hasn't been earlier than 9am, and it's not as loud as a dog barking... but it's definitely not quiet. We only have 2 that are laying so far. Rose sneaks into the nestbox, does her business, and goes on with her life. Bluebell lays an egg, then tells the world about it. (buck buck buGOCK! buck buck buGOCK!) The first time was the loudest, and she seems to be simmering down with the more eggs she lays, so hopefully she won't end up on a plate. :)

Mr. T

2010-01-25T07:54:00.001-08:00

Well, my last post was about the birth of my baby boy, and he's about to turn 4 months now. Oops. Our first 3 months together were less than relaxing. Though I was hopelessly in love with his adorable Daddy-ish face from the moment he was pulled onto my chest, our first three months had me constantly exclaiming "I'm never doing this again!"
His birth was perfect. Nursing was kind of a nightmare. Again. Lots of pain and parts-bleeding-that-should-never-ever-bleed followed by lactation consultants, moments of nursing peace, serious supply issues, pumping-nursing-pumping, T's slow weight gain followed by weight loss, herbs and supplements, more pumping and a little formula, horrible face rashes and all-night-upset-baby, allergy-to-something-in-my-milk diagnoses... and I quit. I made it a month, which was a far cry from the 1-2 years I had planned on nursing him, but I just couldn't handle it anymore. Sigh. I still have moments of regret and some serious mommy-guilt, but looking at his round, smiley-dimpled face it's hard to seriously believe I've done him any harm. He's happy. He's healthy. He's a sweet little cuddlebug who loves nothing more than falling asleep in mama's arms. So why do I still feel like I've failed?!? Ugh.
Other than the nursing, he's definitely been our most challenging baby. And I say that with full awareness that our girls completely and utterly spoiled us. When T didn't sleep through the night at 7 weeks we thought, "What's wrong?" When he would only nap while being held and screamed if *ever* put down I vowed that our family was done. NO MORE BABIES!!
Recently I realized, at not quite 4 months, that almost all of the hard parts are over. Already. He isn't a fan of going more than 5 hours at night without a baba, but he's only up for 15 minutes and sleeps great the rest of the time from 7:30 to 7:30. He naps on his own 3 times a day. He isn't ever fussy unless he's tired or hungry... and even if one of those things is true he still takes the time to flash us one of his HUGE smiles before letting us know we better get a bottle QUICKLY. He's happy to hang out in a stroller now until it's naptime, and then he will instantly fall asleep on me when I put him in the sling or Mei Tai. He's become a little angel baby, and I don't even mind that he still wakes up at night because I love snuggling back to sleep with my sweet guy in my arms. He's still probably our last baby, but now it's just because our family feels complete.

Okay, a few of the quick stats that 3rd babies usually don't have in their nonexistent baby books...

Smiled: 5 weeks
Laughed: 11 weeks
Held head up: 6-7 weeks
Slept through the night: ...TBA :)
Rolled over (accidentally) from stomach to back: 3 months. He's become quite a hefty guy, so some of the physical milestones might take a little while :)

Oh, and one other cute thing before I forget. Thatcher started literally "turning in" for the night at 2 weeks old. He would turn his body towards us and bury his head when he was tired in order to shut out the world. At almost 4 months he still does it...such a cute and quirky little guy. :)

Thatcher's home birth

2009-10-11T10:47:00.000-07:00

I started having contractions about 3 weeks before Thatcher was due-- but they always died out after a couple of hours, and never built up to anything more than uncomfortable. The hard ones would wake me up several times every night... and just as I was getting excited thinking it might be real labor they would go away completely. Very frustrating. The day before Jacob's birthday I was really tired of my ongoing labor, and asked my midwife Wendy to sweep my membranes (if you don't know what that is-- go ahead and google it...I don't want to get too technical :) ) in hopes that it would kickstart my labor. I was dilated to a 1-2 and 50% effaced. I had more contractions, but nothing "real", until we went out for Jacob's birthday.

We walked around San Tan mall for a couple of hours and my contractions got harder. I was still in denial but Jacob thought it might be labor this time. We went home to watch West Wing and see what happened... and the second my butt touched the couch my contractions stopped all together. The same thing happened on and off for the next 3 days, and on Tuesday I went back in to Wendy and asked her to do another membrane sweep. I'd never had such bad "false" labor before, and it was exhausting. I doubted I'd know when I was in "real" labor until I was pretty far advanced... which ended up being true. So I went in Tuesday morning, and when Wendy checked me I was dilated to a 4 and 70% effaced. I was so happy-- at least all of that prelabor was doing something! I had always been in active labor by the time I was dilated to a 2, and had an epidural by the time I was a 4, so I had a feeling that this baby was going to come really fast when it was time. Wendy asked if I wanted to try castor oil to speed things up. She thought that it would probably put me into labor that night, so of course I was all for trying it.

I went home and did 2 doses of castor oil, at 11:00 and 12:00. I felt my normal contractions start up again around 1:00, but nothing serious. The castor oil wasn't a big deal for me like I'd heard it would be. A couple of not-so-pleasant trips to the potty, but that was it. At 2:30 my contractions were 3 minutes apart, but I was sitting on the couch watching Grey's Anatomy with Angie (I just had to breathe more deeply when I got one)-- still very comfortable. I called Wendy just to be sure, and she said to call her back in 30 minutes or when I couldn't watch tv through them anymore. Jacob came home from work, and I had him call Wendy around 3:15 when I got my first few contractions that were hard enough to be true labor.

By 3:30 I knew we would be having a baby that night, though I wasn't having any problem relaxing and breathing through my contractions. They stayed about 3 minutes apart, and lasted about a minute. Wendy arrived at 3:45, and my contractions were building really fast. Each one was stronger than the last, and I started having some back-to-back ones with only a 30 second break. I tried laboring in the tub, in my bed, on all fours with my head on the bed, and finally found the postition I was most comfortable in-- sitting backwards on the toilet with a pillow on the tank. At 4:30 I was overwhelmed with how intense my contractions were, even though I'd only been laboring an hour. I didn't think there was any way I could handle that amount of pain for several hours more-- especially since I had heard that transition was so much harder than earlt labor, so I had Wendy check me to see what I was doing. She checked me, and I was at a 9! I had already made it through transition and I only had minutes, not hours, before I delivered my baby. I felt much more ready to tackle labor knowing I was so close, so I went back to the toilet to finish laboring. The next fifteen minutes were the most painful and intense minutes I've ever experienced, but it helped knowing it would be over soon. Suddenly in the middle of a contraction my body started bearing down and pushing all by itself. It scared me a little because I didn't know if it was time to push yet, but I couldn't stop it. I felt what I thought was his head coming down, but it was my bag of water. It exploded like a water balloon in the toilet, and his head followed quickly. I started panicking and telling Jacob (who was right behind me) that the baby was coming NOW, but I couldn't stop pushing until the contraction was over. Jacob kept telling me we needed to move so the baby wasn't born in the toilet, but I told him I had to wait-- my body wouldn't stop pushing. (all of this took only about a minute) As soon as the contraction let up Jacob helped me into the bathtub. I told him to get Wendy, who was out on the couch, but before he could even leave the bathroom my body started pushing again and Thatcher's head came out. I've heard horror stories about the "ring of fire" when a baby's head is born, but honestly those last few contractions hurt so much that I never even felt it. Jacob tore himself away for a second to yell "Wendy!" and run back to support Thatcher's head. Wendy (and Mom, Dad, Tiff, Layla, Paisley, Angie, Jess, and Jamie) came running in to the bathroom. Wendy told Jacob he was doing a great job and didn't look like he needed any help, and she checked for a cord warapped around Thatcher's head. (he did have it around once, but it was very loose) As soon as she unlooped it over his head, she told me I could push him out when I felt like it, so I gave my first voluntary push and out he came at 4:54! Only an hour and a half after my first real contraction!

It was such an incredible experience, and I know if we have another child we will do it at home again. It was so different from the rushed and hectic hospital birth experiences we've had before. I loved how laid-back Wendy was-- she just let everything happen on it's own. She checked on the baby periodically throughout labor, but left Jacob and I to labor alone like we wanted the majority of the time. She had all of the emergency equipment ready just in case, but none of it needed to be used. After he was born, I got to snuggle with my sweet baby boy, my husband, and our little girls on our couch instead of having to lie on a hospital bed. I wouldn't have changed a thing. <3

Double Trouble

2009-09-15T12:55:00.000-07:00

I'm very VERY lucky to have 2 little girls who play together for hours. They are the best of friends, and despite the once-an-hour-spat that I have to break up, they will seriously play together in their room all morning long. Recently, however, we found that there is a downside to best-friend-sissies... and it's called teamwork.

Layla is a very obedient, sensitive little girl (despite the recent talking-back phase) so she obeys the rules because she doesn't want to get in trouble. What she DOESN'T mind, however, is when Paisley gets in trouble... so Layla has become the (other) little devil on Paisley's shoulder. Layla plans the operation, Paisley carries it out, and then Layla blames it on Paisley. It would be a perfect scam if she didn't have 2 semi-intelligent parents who figured out exactly what was going on. Here are some examples from the last week or so:

I walk out of my room when I realize it's been quiet for far too long. I find both girls sitting on the floor, sharing a leftover cup of Sonic ice cream that's been hijacked from the freezer. Paisley looks up and says "Hi Mommy." then returns to eating her ice cream. (Being in trouble has never phased her much) Layla, on the other hand, panicks at being caught, and shouts "Paisley got it out of the freezer! And look what she did to my (ice-cream-covered) hands!" Now I have no doubt that it WAS Paisley who got it out of the freezer, but I'm thinking she was not responsible for sticking her sister's hands in the cup and forcing her to eat some. Just a guess.

The next day, I saw Layla whisper in Paisley's ear, and then Paisley went directly to the freezer and opened it. I said, "What are you doing?!? Stay out of the freezer!" to which Layla replied "We're just getting ice for our water." Okay, plausible, and I would have believed her if she wasn't contradicted a second later by her little sister who said, "No, we-o yooking fo mo ice cweam!" My oldest little angel is now blatantly lying to stay out of trouble!

Yesterday, they were coloring at the kitchen table, but when the incessant chatter stopped for a full 5 minutes, I knew they had moved on to more devious activities. As I got up to investigate, Layla ran into my room (with a sticky face and strawberry breath) and said, "Mommy, come quick! Paisley got into the cereal bars!" I find Paisley still hiding under the kitchen table, surrounded by 4 perfectly opened, empty wrappers. Strange, because Paisley can't open cereal bar wrappers by herself. Stranger still, that Layla had waited until the precise moment that every last cereal bar was gone to come tattle. Then there was, of course, the strawberry cereal bar all over Layla's face, and the fact that even Paisley can't down 4 bars in less than 4 minutes.

These daughters of mine are getting to be a regular Bonnie and Clyde. Well, you know, if Bonnie and Clyde had been a little less murderous and a little more hungry for sweets.

Nature or Nurture?

2009-09-03T08:33:00.000-07:00

So, I'm a list-maker. A completely obsessive one. I'm not sure that they actually help me stay more organized, but that's the idea. On my desk right now are at least 6 different lists, from what I need to make the girls' Halloween costumes to the chores I need to get done this week. I know it would be more helpful if I had a planner, or if I kept all of my endles lists online, but then I wouldn't have the satisfaction of crossing things off by hand...so I continue to kill trees to satisfy my own mania.

Yesterday I found out that either Layla has been watching my list-making frenzy, or she's inherited some of my crazy genes and can't help herself. She was in my room, supposedly napping, and when I came in to check her I found that she had hijacked my pen and wrote herself "lists" completely covering 5 sheets of paper. I especially like how she mimicked my disorganization... main list in the middle, smaller lists that I forgot earlier running down the sides and top, and then the circling and "relocation" of things that I ended up putting in the wrong spot or didn't have time for. That's my girl. :)

Whew, now that I got this done I get to cross off "blog about Layla's list" and move on to the next thing. :)

Nom Nom Nom

2009-08-27T18:28:00.000-07:00

We always joke about Paisley's ever-present wedgie... so naturally we decided to draw a face on her bootie and take pictures. I don't see that we had any other choice.

Let's see, time for some random Mac girl memories over the last several weeks...

Layla has started calling herself "Yay-yuh" when referring to herself around Paisley or any other small child. "Yay-yuh will get you a drink... do you want water?" You know, like I call myself Mommy. I think she's old enough to move out and get her own place now.

Paisley pronounces the word "fancy" as "dancy"... as in, "Yook mommy, that pwetty dwess is so dancy!" Fairly appropriate actually.

The other (particularly stressful) day, after I was apparently being impatient with my children, Paisley lined up her stuffed animals and was lecturing them, "No whining! That's not nice! If yo whining you need to go to bed! It's yate! Go wite to bed and I'll see you in the mowning. No hitting yo sis-toe! You hafto shay-o yo toys!" At least I always have instant feedback on how I'm doing as a mother.

From Layla a few weeks ago; "I can't wait to be a mommy, so when I grow up I'm going to look for a boy..." (she pauses and looks at me--apparently I look like an emotional pregnant basketcase) "But... we don't have to talk about that right now."

Oh, and earlier that day Layla has been asking me about each kind of animal and whether it laid eggs like a chicken or had babies like mommy. (this pregnancy has been quite educational for her) After the zillionth animal she asked about, she concluded "So... it seems like animals that have fur have their babies like people, and animals without fur lay eggs." Sometimes she's so smart it's scary.

I'll end with a quote from me: "We don't put beetles in our panties." While this is one of those truths which I held to be self-evident, it wasn't at the time. Well, it sort of was, in that WE did not put beetles in our panties. In the long, long list of things I never thought I'd say... that one ranks near the top.

Random cute things my kids have done lately...

2009-07-14T10:15:00.000-07:00

Time goes to warp speed when you're a parent, and I've let way too many adorable sayings go by without writing them down. Anything not etched in stone is bound to get lost in the meandering maze of my mommy-brain, so, alliteration aside, here a few of the things I haven't forgotten yet.

Paisley and Layla both called bananas "mee-maws" when they were little...Paisley has now switched to calling them "ba-mee-maws"

Paisley has started fixing her L's, which is heartbreaking. She now, with obvious effort, calls her sister Layla instead of "Yay-yuh" :(

Both girls are absolutely obsessed with their baby brother (or "baby bru-dough Thatch-oh" as Paisley calls him) They love hugging and kissing my belly, playing with his diapers and tiny clothes, and asking lots of questions about him. Layla is really excited to see him be born, and after countless youtube videos of women giving birth at home, she's all prepped for the big day.

Both girls are ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED with books. They wake up around 6:30-7:00, but they don't get up until around 7:30. Until then I can hear Paisley "reading" in her bed over the monitor. It probably adds up to 3 hours a day of reading, sometimes more. Luckily for me most of that is on their own...there are only so many times I can read the same book without going insane. (which must be completely baffling to them-- the more the better!)

Today when I got out of the shower Paisley informed me that I had a nice bootie and boobies. Apparently someone has been spending too much time around Daddy. This was refreshing after the many, many less...uh, positive remarks about my birthday suit. (wow, you have a big bootie mommy!, mommy, you look weird!, ha ha, I see yo boobies!) Motherhood can be hard on one's self-esteem. After Paisley's encouragement, both girls started following me around asking lots of detailed questions, which led to some speed-dressing on my part.

I have many more to add, but it's hard to remember the sweet, adorable things your children have done recently when they're fighting and arguing while whining and begging for lunch. I'll add more...eventually.

*New quote from Layla*
"Mommy, you won't have to take care of baby brother-- we'll do that. You will have to milk him though, because our boobs aren't big enough."

She also informed me that when she gets older she will be marrying Josh (Clark)...though that was only after I explained to her that she couldn't marry her cousin Brayden. Sorry Josh, second choice is still pretty good.. :)

Sometimes I wish my daughter wasn't so smart (or curious)...

2009-06-15T11:59:00.000-07:00

I always said I'd be completely open with my kids...if they were old enough to ask, I would tell them whatever they wanted to know. Little did I know my first child would be ridiculously intelligent with an insatiable need to understand EVERYTHING in her world.

Sometimes it was just a little uncomfortable for me, like when she asked about periods at 2 1/2 in a public bathroom. No big deal, but I wasn't exactly prepared with a speech. We covered the basics, and I explained what tampons were and why mommy needed them sometimes. (and no, mommy wasn't putting them in her bootie-- can you please use your quiet voice?!?)

Sometimes I was proud of her thirst for knowledge, like when she wanted to know how babies got out of tummys at age 3. It would have probably scared the wits out of a ten year old, but at 3 she just said, "Oh, they come out of va-jay-jays. I wondered how they came out." Though of course it didn't end there, because she has to think through everything until it makes perfect sense to her, so she came back a minute later and asked if it hurt the baby to come out that way. Did it hurt the mommy? Was there blood? How does the baby eat and drink while it's inside? How does it breathe? ...I was impressed with her reasoning, and not uncomfortable with the subject matter so we talked all about it-- she's probably more informed on the matter than most pre-teens are.

Which lead a few months later with a subject that made me break my own rule of "if they're old enough to ask..." How babies are made. I gave the generic answer, that it takes a mommy and a daddy. Of course that wasn't enough for her, and she asked, "But HOW?" So I told her that Daddy had a seed and Mommy had an egg, and when they were put together a baby was made. (Again, I didn't have a speech prepared about sex for my three year old.) Still not happy with the answer, she asked, "WHERE are the seed and egg?" Uh....In Mommy and Daddy's bodies. (not done yet) "Well how does Daddy get his seed to Mommy's egg?"...which is where I cut it off and broke my rule. I told her that we'd talk more about it when she got a little older. I was actually fine with going the whole nine yards, but I didn't really want her telling all of her friends things they didn't need to know and probably had never thought about. Yikes.

Lately her inquisitive mind has brought us both to tears... like when she heard that sea turtles live longer than humans. She thought about that for a while, and then asked how long humans lived. I told her about 100 years. She said, "You mean I'm going to die?" (tears begin here-- for both of us) I tried to tell her that she had a LONG LONG time before she needed to think about that, which made her realize that I was older than her, which made her ask if I was going to die. Ugh. I felt a huge temptation to tell her no, that we would both live forever and our lives would be filled with candy and puppies and laughter... but she's too smart to fall for that, and I don't want to shield her from life, I just want to hold her while she finds out the bad things. Well that's a lie. At that moment I very much wanted to shield her, but I didn't. I told her that all people die, but they live a LONG LONG time, and they get to be babies, then kids, then teenagers, then mommies, then grandmas, then great-grandmas.... and we agreed that she could start worrying about people dying when she turned 40. Unfortunately I'm sure she'll hear soon about a child or mommy dying, and we'll have to talk about that... but the fact that people die at all was enough sadness for one day.

Which brings us to our most recent conversation (about an hour ago), where she, at almost 4, figured out that not all mommies and daddies stay married to each other. It began out of the blue-- I think Shrek was on in the car, but obviously her little mind was somewhere else. "Mommy, Papa is your Dad and Grammy is your mom, right?" I told her of course, she's known that for years. "But who is Grammy's husband?" she asked. I told her she knew who Grammy's husband was, but I could already see where she was going with this. "Well, Grandpa Dennis is Grammy's husband, but shouldn't Papa be? Grandpa Dennis isn't your dad." she told me. I took a moment deciding how to procede with this... I really have no excuse for not having thoughts prepared on every subject matter imaginable by now-- I should know she's going to ask, but somehow she keeps catching me unprepared. I decided she'll know kids with divorced parents soon enough, so I might as well tell her. I told her that Grammy and Papa were married, and they had Aunt Fifi and me, but then they decided they didn't want to be married anymore, so they got a divorce. Lots of years later, Grammy married Grandpa Dennis. I told her that some married people didn't stay married forever, then I reassured her that mommy and daddy loved each other very,very much and we would always be married. She asked, "You mean we'll always be a family?" (thanks to pregnancy I'm tearing up at this point) and I told her "Mommy PROMISES. I will always love your daddy, and we will always be a family. Mommy and Daddy are never, EVER getting a divorce." To which she replied, "Oh, okay." and happily began singing along with Shrek. I'm glad she recovered so well, but I need a nap. :)

I'm obviously a committed blogger.

2009-03-11T09:39:00.001-07:00

My second-to-last post was about my daughter turning three...and in 3 months she'll be four. I definitely need to get on the ball here. How about a quick overview of the past 6-8 months? I'll assume you just said, "Why yes, please! Fill us in!" :) Okay, since you asked... Layla turned 3, the girls became playmates (yay!), we got pregnant and miscarried :( , we went to San Fran for Christmas and had a great time with Jacob's family and the Hacketts, we came back and got pregnant again (woo-hoo!-- EDD is Oct. 7th), Paisley grew up (seriously-- it was like overnight. She started talking in sentences, listening to her parents, stopped getting in trouble, learned her colors/shapes/letters/numbers...I think she was just ready to be a big sister).... I think those are all of the highlights. Coming soon: Paisley turns 2, Mommy turns 28, Angie graduates highschool, and Layla turns 4!

Okay, now that we're all caught up, I'm going to try to blog once a week. Ha.

Are you kidding me child?

2008-08-05T19:35:00.000-07:00

So I'm sitting next to Layla watching cartoons in the family room, and I realize Paisley has been awfully quiet in the kitchen. Though that usually spells trouble, I am not concerned. I have installed child safety locks on every kitchen cabinet, locked the water and ice dispenser, and put door knob locks on all downstairs doors. I've even bought trash cans that were too tall for her to reach into, and that have lids that are wedged under the first pantry shelf so she can't remove them. I am not concerned. And then I see a small fuzzy head peep up into my line of sight OVER the kitchen bar, and hear a squeal of pure delight. She has just scaled a chair, pulled herself from the chair onto our pub-height table, and is now dancing with glee. Luckily, she doesn't fall off before I can grab her. Even luckier, my camera is handy. If we make it to 2 before we visit the emergency room, it will be a miracle.

The Birthday Girl

2008-07-07T12:26:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I have a 3-year old. I mean, I can believe it because she's acted like she was 3 since she was 1, but still...3!!?? Where did the time go? My baby isn't a baby anymore. She's not even technically a toddler. She's a, what, preschooler? I'm not ready for backpacks and lunches and big yellow school buses. Okay, I have 2 more years until the school bus, but 2 years seems not so far away.
But enough emotional-mommy talk...this post was supposed to be about her birthday party, which was a lot of fun. She has her friends Emma, Josh, Kiefer, and Brayden over, and they all took turns beating on a pinata which evidently necessitated a real bat instead of a plastic one. With a little mommy-help it was eventually opened. She got lots of nice presents, including plenty of sparkly dress-up clothes which are her and Sissy's current favorite thing to play with. Thanks for coming everybody, and thanks for the great gifts!

Stay Classy San Diego

2008-05-10T15:39:00.001-07:00

It's Alive!!! (muahahahaha)

2008-05-10T15:32:00.000-07:00

So we actually got something to grow! I picked 5 heads of lettuce, and they filled a huge colander. They were still on the small side, but the aphids have moved in and were really interested in the salad bar we had going...so I figured better small than never. Coming soon: cherry tomatoes and (we hope) green beans and squash!

Survivor-- vegetable edition

2008-04-20T11:28:00.000-07:00

Umm...this is what I saw today when I opened my composter for the first time in a week.The only thing I think they could be is soybeans-- from the edamame that was boxed, frozen, bought at Costco, probably allowed to defrost (you gotta sit and have a hot dog after a tedious day shopping at Costco), refrozen in my fridge at home, and then microwaved for 3 minutes. After surviving all that, I'd hate to have them die now-- so we're trying to figure out how to transplant them somewhere safer without shocking the heck out of them. Apparently soybeans like coffee as much as I do, They were growing in 3 inches of it.

ETA: Okay, so apparently soybeans CAN'T survive all that-- when I went to dig them up I saw that they were growing out of squash shells. I had forgotten that I threw away some butternut squash guts a couple of weeks ago. Actually that's really exciting, because our family eats butternut squash by the truckload-- so if we can actually manage to grow some fruit before we kill the plants, we'll be all set for the summer (you know, butternut squash-wise) We planted 21 of the plants in our garden, and gave away 40+ more to Jamie, the Bams, and the Grzeckas. Actually, we did more of a run-by-seedling with the Gerckies-- they might not have even wanted them. Hehe. :)

Layla's New Do...

2008-04-16T19:48:00.000-07:00

I decided to bob Layla's hair for the summer. (Daddy thinks it's really cute short) I found out from Tasia that some hair donation organizations --like Pantene's Beautiful L engths-- let you donate only 8" of hair, which Layla BARELY had to give (so it's a little shorter than originally planned) It was a really unique opportunity to teach her about giving, and she let everyone know that she "donated her ponytail to kids that needed some hair." I love her new do, and so does Daddy-- although it makes her look closer to 5 than 2. :( BTW I wasn't just letting myself off the hook... I was ready to donate 8" too, but they don't accept dyed or highlighted hair. *whew!*

Mommy I'm hungry

2008-03-04T10:39:00.000-08:00

My new (other) full-time job is feeding my daughter. I can't believe this kid! This is the tally so far...
*A big cup of milk
*2 scrambled eggs and a hunk of cheddar cheese
*A cereal bowl 1/2 full of yogurt and granola
*15 cherry tomatoes
*That same cereal bowl 1/2 full of chunky applesauce
*3/4 can of tuna (mixed up into tuna salad) with AT LEAST 15 wheat crackers
*another big cup of milk
...at this point I cut her off when she asked for more yogurt. :)

.......it's only 11:30am.

**EDITED to add the rest of the day...**
*10 more wheat crackers
* 1/3 zucchini muffin
*1/2 banana
*another bowl of applesauce
*another bowl of yogurt & granola
*1 1/2 pieces of veggie supreme pizza (entire thing, crust included-- with ranch)
*cup of milk

didn't take the time to do a calorie count, but I'm guessing 2,000. Wowsa!!

If laughing really burns so many calories, I should be a lot skinnier

2008-02-12T12:46:00.000-08:00

I don’t even know where to start… I learned 3 things today; I drink too much coffee, I go to IKEA too often, and Layla is already smarter than I am.

Let’s see, for number one, we were talking about the names of baby animals. She told me a baby horse was a foal, a baby dog was a puppy, a baby chicken was a chick, a baby sheep was a lamb, and a baby cow was a half-and-half. : )

We got in the car and I told Layla we were going to IKEA, and she said, “Oh! IKEA! It’s the big blue house with giant “lellow” letters... I, E…what’s the other letters mommy?”

As we were driving, born out of the baby animal conversation, we were talking about the difference between things that are alive, and things that aren’t alive. (It started because she asked what a baby house was called) I gave her some examples and told her that things that are alive eat, move, and grow. She quickly got it, and named “alive” things. “People are alive, bushes are alive, horses are alive, trucks are alive…” I corrected her and told her trucks weren’t alive. “Yes they are mommy. That truck is moving. Do you see it moving? It eats gas. It’s alive.”

*Last cute saying today, I promise* Layla was “cooking” in her room, and I asked what she was making. “ I’m just making some food mommy. I’m kind of a good cook.”

5

2008-02-08T20:20:00.000-08:00

That's the number of bruises on Paisley's face today. It's not neglectful parenting, it's learning to walk. And possibly some neglectful parenting. Sorry baby. Yesterday she only had two bruises on her right side, and I got some adorable pictures after she pulled up on the coffee table (and before she fell back down again) I had to angle the camera to her left side...and cover her forehead up with her hoodie...but **bragging mommy warning** does it get any cuter than this little girl?

It's here. And it's just a diaper.

2008-02-04T13:56:00.000-08:00

In the world of cloth diapering, the name of Goodmama is king. These much-acclaimed $34 dipes are so sought after, that a mama must patiently "stalk" them on hyena cart, and even then is more likely than not to return empty-handed. After reading SO many good things about them, I decided I had to try one. I scored a used one for $28 including shipping, which was an amazing deal considering some mamas are actually charging MORE for their used Goodmamas then they originally paid for them! I (impatiently) waited and waited, and today it came. It was everything I'd read it would be...incredibly soft organic cotton velour, super stretchy, adorable print, fabulously absorbent...but I have to admit I'm still a little let down. I don't know what I expected, but it's just a diaper. A really snuggly soft beautiful diaper--but just a diaper. There's no way I can afford a whole stash of GMs, so I took a photo shoot of Paisley in the most expensive diaper she will ever wear--and I'll most likely resell it.

Her Daddy's Daughter

2008-02-03T21:16:00.000-08:00

I'm not one to wonder how things were made or how they work. If everyone were like me, there wouldn't be any fancy-pants inventions like electricity...or automobiles...or indoor plumbing. Not that I don't love those things-- I just never would have thought of them. (but on the upside, the world would be very organized and aesthetically pleasing) Anyway, Layla evidently takes after Daddy, because the other day in the car she asked me, "Mommy, why do bikes and cars both have wheels?" I was impressed. I told her that's how they both move-they roll on wheels. "Oh, like a ball rolls?" she asked. "Just like a ball!" I told her. "But how do they roll?" she wondered. Uh-oh. "Well baby, cars have engines, and they move the, uh, pistons-er-gaskets...I mean, the wheels are on axles that spin on the...umm...I bet Daddy wants to tell you when he gets home from work!" Shoot. She's only 2 1/2, and she's already stumping mommy.

Thoughtful Living

2008-02-01T07:35:00.000-08:00

We've been moving quickly on the path to crunchiness, and I know some of my family thinks I'm out of my cloth-diapering, tree-hugging mind, so I thought I'd attempt to explain myself. For us, it's been as simple (and as difficult) as trying to extend our beliefs and convictions about Christianity into our consumer lives. As cheesy as it is, I try to "do what Jesus would do" in my everyday life interactions...I try to be patient with my kids, friendly with the grocery store clerk, courteous on the road... I'm far from perfecting it, but it's a goal I strive for. Over the past year as I've been reading and learning more about the environment and our effect on it, I have slowly realized that my consumer actions have as real of an impact on others as my social actions do. God calls us to love and care for one another, but he also charges us with taking care of the world he gave us. Suddenly using 20 plastic bags for grocery shopping every week seemed in line with kicking a puppy or yelling at my kids. All of those things have a very real negative impact on others--even though some may be harder to see.
I'm trying to practice thoughtful living. We do a lot of things just because, well, that's the way we've always done them. I don't want to do that anymore. I want to think about things before I do them. How will using disposable diapers vs. cloth diapers effect the environment? Do I want pesticides used on my produce? How does buying this coffee effect the poor farmers in South America? Do I really need individually wrapped everything? We are so used to living a disposable life because it's convenient-- but is it worth the cost? I don't pretend to have the "answer" if there is one, and I'm not saying that any specific action is what everyone must do...I'm just saying that I want to stop and think before I buy. Having children has made me more aware that I want to leave the Earth a little better than I found it. If my new-found crunchiness is annoying, you can blame the girls. :)